And I also enjoy the diary-like aspect of the annual challenge, cataloging each year some of my favorite jams. This will mark the fourth year I’ve ranked my top albums in some fashion or another and it’s a tradition I plan to stick to.

These are the 26 albums that made me stop for a moment. To listen to more than simply one catchy track amidst a mix on shuffle. That either made me picture a different reality or conjure my own in a way that probably wouldn’t have otherwise been possible. I’ve chosen a track from each to comprise two 8tracks mixes: Part one (#26-14) here, part two (#13-1) here. And without further ado:

1. PJ Harvey – Let England Shake
2. Dum Dum Girls – Only In Dreams
3. Lykke Li – Wounded Rhymes
4. Girls – Father, Son, Holy Ghost
5. M83 – Hurry Up, We’re Dreaming
6. EMA – Past Life Martyred Saints
7. Destroyer – Kaputt
8. Kate Bush – 50 Words For Snow
9. The Weeknd – Echoes of Silence
10. Iceage – New Brigade
11. The Roots – Undun
12. Beyonce – 4
13. Pictureplane – Thee Physical
14. Yuck – Yuck
15. Gang Gang Dance – Eye Contact
16. Zola Jesus – Conatus
17. The Kills – Blood Pressures
18. The Pains Of Being Pure At Heart – Belong
19. Shannon and the Clams – Sleep Talk
20. Rihanna – Talk That Talk
21. Cold Cave – Cherish The Light Years
22. Neon Indian – Era Extrana
23. Le Butcherettes – Sin Sin Sin
24. Black Lips – Arabia Mountain
25. Battles - Gloss Drop
26. Planningtorock – W

First, there’s the change of season — often as harsh as it is lovely and unpredictable. And there’s also my birthday, which arrives on the 3rd of the month.

But, in recent years I’ve also come to love the trend of “No Shave November” mustache and/or beard campaigns. As a not-particularly-athletic person who admires the many individuals who run marathons to raise money for various organizations and groups, I think it’s important to have another sort of venture that individuals can coalesce around for a good cause.

And frankly, there are some of us for whom facial hair growth is a unique talent. Sort of like calligraphy or crafting gem sweaters.

So, this year, I’ve decided to take up a “No Shave November” challenge of my own. After starting the month with an already-pretty-unruly beard, I’ve pledged to donate $5 (or the price of a really fancy cup of coffee) to the Greater Chicago Food Depository for every day I can manage to resist the urge to trim this baby down.

I will be documenting my progress both here and on my Tumblr blog.

Beardiness as of Nov. 7. Seven days in. $5 a day to the GCFD. $35 pledged thus far.

So, why a food bank rather than any other cause? A study released earlier this year estimated that just over 20 percent of Chicagoans struggle with food insecurity, meaning that are unsure where their next meal will come from or how they will pay for it. They go to sleep hungry. In some parts of this highly racially and economically segregated city, that number is as high as 40 percent. As a result, groups like the GCFD have been overwhelmed with record-high demand at a time when their support at the federal, state and individual donor levels is declining. I feel like this is an overlooked issue that could only get worse with the current state of things. I wanted to do something about it.

If you feel so inspired, I urge you to consider making a contribution of your own to the GCFD or perhaps another food bank or group working to fight food insecurity. You can even donate a certain amount for each day my beard continues to grow. If I make it the entire month and you donate 50 cents for each day I grizzle it out, that means $15 for the food bank.

Here’s hoping we can all help some folks out this month. Please let me know if you decide to join in on my little experiment, so I can give you some much-deserved props. Thanks for your support.

My personal favorite albums of 2010:

1. Titus Andronicus – The Monitor — listen to the top 10
2. Ariel Pink’s Haunted Graffiti – Before Today
3. Twin Shadow – Forget
4. LCD Soundsystem – This Is Happening
5. Jonsi – Go
6. Deerhunter – Halcyon Digest
7. Male Bonding – Nothing Hurts
8. Owen Pallett – Heartland
9. Glasser – Ring
10. Marnie Stern – s/t
11. Local Natives – Gorilla Manor – listen to #11-21
12. Lower Dens – Twin-Hand Movement
13. Tame Impala – Innerspeaker
14. Robyn – Body Talk
15. Wild Nothing – Gemini
16. Sufjan Stevens – The Age of Adz
17. Joanna Newsom – Have One On Me
18. The National – High Violet
19. Menomena – Mines
20. Sharon Jones and the Dap-Kings – I Learned the Hard Way
21. Dessa – A Badly Broken Code
22. Sharon Van Etten – Epic – listen to the rest
23. Matthew Dear – Black City
24. Beach Fossils – s/t
25. Diamond Rings – Special Affections
26. Janelle Monae - The ArchAndroid
27. No Age – Everything In Between
28. Foals – Total Life Forever
29. S. Carey – All We Grow
**Girls – Broken Dreams Club
**Active Child – Curtis Lane
**Generationals – Trust

Titus Andronicus

Honorable mentions: Salem – King Night, Warpaint – The Fool, PS I Love You – Meet Me at the Muster Station, Erykah Badu – New Amerykah Part Two (Return of the Ankh), Eternal Summers – Silver

2010 was a great year for music, and as such, I must add one important caveat to this list: I was fortunate enough to see several of the acts listed below live in concert and those experiences surely colored my enjoyment of their recorded material ever since. LCD Soundsystem and Titus Andronicus at Pitchfork, Twin Shadow at Schubas, Jonsi at the Vic, Local Natives at the Metro and Owen Pallett at Lincoln Hall were all fan-freaking-tastic (if not brilliant, in the case of some) live shows that really spoke truth to the power of each of their albums released this year. On the flip side, I didn’t so much jive with either Sleigh Bells’ or Best Coast’s sets at Pitchfork this summer, and it soured me on their albums. I have a feeling that, were my economic situation different, had I seen a few of the other acts on this list in concert – namely Janelle Monae, Joanna Newsom and Sufjan Stevens – they likely would have been higher, but such is life.

Joanna Newsom

What I really loved about albums like Titus, Jonsi and LCD’s releases were that they were able to take huge, grandiose things — in the case of Titus and LCD, some pretty epic songs; with Titus, a nerdy historical concept; with Jonsi, some pretty epic instrumentation — and made it work. They made it near-perfection, in my mind. Other albums – like Joanna’s and Sufjan’s – also had lofty ambitions and have some really glimmering moments, but on the whole, I think both suffered from their lack of editing.

Jonsi

The opposite extreme of the spectrum: Somewhat simple, often brief music, also really stood out to me this year. The Lower Dens’ debut album, as well as Carey and Van Etten’s, provided us with a much-needed break from the grandiose. Their voices are endearingly raw at times and it all adds up to so much more than the sum of each song’s parts.

All of these albums helped me through the difficult times this year and if you haven’t heard any of the above artists before, I’d highly recommend you check out the mixes and if you like what you hear, head out and buy their album, see their show the next time they’re in town and tell your friends about what you’re listening to. I highly doubt you’ll regret it.

Farewell, Senator Feingold.

To be sure, the disappointments are there too, and there are many. Wisconsin Senator Russ Feingold, known best as the lone dissenting voice against the Patriot Act, was blown out of the water by his heavily-financed-by-out-of-state-$$$ Republican competitor Ron Johnson in my home state. Vehemently anti-war and a friend to the LGBT and immigrant communities, Feingold was a unique politician who truly voted with both his heart and mind — not always with his party. He will be missed dearly.

In Iowa, out-of-state, anti-gay dollars to the estimated tune of at least $600,000 squelched any hope of three state Supreme Court judges there to retain their jobs, collapsing under the weight of a far-reaching campaign to oust them following their affirmation of same-sex marriage in 2008. Brian Brown, leader of the National Organization for Marriage, one of the anti-gay organizations that bankrolled the campaign against the judges, is touting their successful campaign as “sending a powerful message to any judge who thinks they can impose gay marriage by judicial fiat against the wishes of the people.” NOM spent, all told, $7 million on this and other races in the name of “protecting marriage,” rendering mixed results but solidifying its status as the leading, most well-funded anti-gay group in the country.

Another important, mostly under-the-radar development is the likely death of net neutrality — a principle that blocks Internet service providers and governments from having too much influence on the Internet as we see it or creating tiers of “premium” access at different price points. Out-of-state funding here contributed to every single one of the 95 House Democrats who stood against net neutrality losing their races. Al Franken has called this the “First Amendment issue of our time” and, given Tuesday’s results, that may not turn out to be too broad of a hyperbole.

It was further saddening to see Penn. Congressman Patrick Murphy lose his race to Mike Fitzpatrick. Murphy was one of the leading voices in the House for the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell and was growing into a strong ally for LGBT people there on any number of issues. The fact that Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann earned over 50 percent of the popular vote statewide for the first time in her re-election is also somewhat troubling. Bachmann has consistently described gay people as having “sexual identity disorders” among any number of troubling positions on a number of social and economic issues. She stands a good shot at becoming the GOP’s Conference Chair.

But there is a glimmer of good news for LGBT activists. For the most part, candidates who campaigned on a fringe perspective, embracing anti-gay rhetoric to be used toward our communities and families, lost. And they did so from coast to coast: Senatorial candidates Ken Buck in Colorado, Sharron Angle in Nevada, Joe Miller in Alaska and Christine O’Donnell in Delaware. Gubernatorial candidates Carl Paladino and Bill Brady in California and Illinois. I repeat: They all lost.. except for South Carolina’s Senator Jim DeMint, who has said that openly gay and sexually active, unmarried straight teachers should be barred from teaching children.

No dice this time, Miss Angle.

Perhaps now more than ever, public homophobia has become a political liability, unless you live in South Carolina apparently. But that’s not to say that politicians (both parties included here) are going to march, lock in step, toward endorsing equality for LGBT Americans or any other minority group. It seems just as likely that while public disgust with gay people may wane, that bigotry may continue its shift toward open racism against Muslim Americans and immigrant communities. And chances of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, the Employment Non-Discrimination Act or comprehensive immigration reform passing during the lame-duck Senate session appear incredibly slim.

As of earlier this year, a higher percentage of Americans reported having negative feelings toward Muslims than reported opposing same-sex marriage. And while many politicians who utilized anti-Muslim rhetoric during their campaigns lost their elections – including Angle and Paladino who, notably, were also mentioned two paragraphs above – in Oklahoma, a ballot initiative successfully barred judges from “considering Islamic or international law when making a ruling.”

Indeed, bigotry remains alive and well and it would appear that any checks of the growing corporate influence on our politics, culture and lives will continue to be difficult to come by. It’s funny, over the course of this column those glimmers of “good news” have lost some of their sparkle so.. take that for what you will.

I’ll leave you with a song that feels appropriate as a lullaby to progressives everywhere today: Metric’s Emily Haines’ Winning.

*If you don’t already know, I attended college at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, based in Dane County, one of only a handful of counties that did not vote to elect former president Bush to his second term in 2004, which marked my first time voting in a presidential race.

I wrote a feature for EDGE last week profiling Andy Blubaugh, the director of just one of the films playing the festival this year, The Adults in the Room. Blubaugh, who lives in Portland, Ore., takes a somewhat unusual approach to his filmmaking, using his own life experiences as a lens through which to view various social phenomena. In this, his first feature, Blubaugh references his experience as a 15-year-old engaging in a romantic relationship which a closeted man nearly twice his age, juxtaposing this narrative both with his own filmmaking process and the controversy surrounding Portland mayor Sam Adams’ relationship with a 17-year-old Beau Breedlove. The film deals with a potentially squeamish subject with a fresh perspective — one that makes it stand out from a lot of other queer cinema.

The Adults in the Room

“It was never my intent to be a ‘gay filmmaker,’ which is not to say that I don’t appreciate the support I’ve gotten from the queer filmmaking community and festivals I’ve been lucky enough to screen at, but I never considered that to be my home. I just make personal films and happen to be gay,” Blubaugh said.

This film, playing the festival Monday, November 8, at Landmark’s Century Centre Cinema at 7:30 p.m., is just one of many gems playing the festival. Given the phenomenal contribution Reeling makes to this city’s dialogue on LGBT issues, I wanted to take a moment to spotlight five of its other offerings that would probably be worth your time to check out:

Gen Silent (Saturday, 11/6, 12 p.m.) – A Stu Maddux-directed documentary on the difficulties facing the aging LGBT population, a group that fought so hard to climb out of the closet only to be forced back in the winter of their lives.

JoJo Baby (Saturday, 11/6, 5 p.m.) – A hometown film depicting the man (and the dolls) that lives behind the wild makeup of JoJo Baby, a portrait of a truly inspired and bizarre queer artist. The documentary is produced by horror extraordinaire Clive Barker (Hellraiser, Candyman).

I Killed My Mother (J’ai Tue Ma Mere) (Saturday, 11/6, 7:15 p.m.) – A French coming-of-age feature from writer-director-actor Xavier Dolan telling the story of an angsty gay teen deeply at odds with his family. Bonus: Major hottie factor.

Rock Hudson: Dark and Handsome Stranger (Tuesday, 11/9, 7:15 p.m.) – We like to throw around Hudson’s name knowingly when discussing the legacy of gay actors in Hollywood, but how much do we really know about the former A-Lister, who was outed when he succumbed to AIDS in 1985? This documentary digs deeper.

Undertow (Contracorriente) (Saturday, 11/13, 7 p.m.) – Peru’s official submission for Best Foreign Language Film at the 2011 Academy Awards is closing out this year’s Reeling. The feature tells the story of a sexy married fisherman’s complicated gay affair.

So… maybe I am a tad biased toward documentaries and foreign films? In addition to these, the Ewan McGregor-Jim Carrey gay film that’s finally seeing its limited American release after innumerable delays, I Love You Phillip Morris, plays Wednesday, 11/10, 9 p.m. And the shorts program titled Love is a Battlefield (Sunday, 11/7, 1:15 p.m.) includes two of James Franco’s shorts — including that naked basketball one.

Support queer film and check out Reeling ’10!

As of this Friday, I’ll be taking a leave from the fantastical Chicagoist. In the year-ish since I came on board the site, I’ve written 101 posts and enjoyed an incredible opportunity to reach a new audience with my writings on Chicago’s queer communities while dabbling in a bit of witchcraft – er, music coverage – too. (What, you haven’t!?) Dreams came true when I interviewed Mink Stole. I had an outlet for what turned out being a love letter of sorts to Courtney Love and ’90s nostalgia. And, more importantly, I had the opportunity to work closely with a talented bunch of hyper-motivated and hardworking fellow writers who I’m sure will continue to shock and amaze. So, if you haven’t already, please bookmark and follow Chicagoist religiously, as though it were the cult you almost joined in college. I promise you won’t be disappointed.

While you’re bookmarking things, be sure to add the Windy City Times’ home page, where you will shortly find news coverage written by yours truly. As of this week, I’m coming on board the incredible enterprise, which just celebrated its 25th anniversary of publication. I am honored and humbled to have the opportunity to work with such a legendary paper. As I described in my interview with publisher Tracy Baim for ChicagoPride.com, I think the paper provides not only invaluably attentive coverage of this city’s LGBT community, but also crucial visibility. I very much encourage you to check out last week’s special issue commemorating the paper’s silver anniversary to learn more about the paper’s past, present and future.

My work will also continue to be featured on ChicagoPride.com and Edge Media Network. Follow me on Twitter to stay on top of my latest pieces, and also be sure to visit my blog, which will continue to feature various run-off — most recently my response to former presidential candidate Mike Huckabee who, for some reason, is really obsessed with some article I wrote earlier this year.

Thank you all for your support through clicks, retweets, e-mails, “likes,” Facebook postings, comments, etc. etc., etc. As a good friend of mine, Brittany Julious pointed out in a recent interview with ch!cktionary, these are challenging times for freelance writers and every nugget of encouragement is fuel for our passions. Both that and news like this. And songs like this.

I read the New Yorker article, your statement and all the news stories I could get my grubby mitts on with the hopes of better understanding your position toward LGBT equality and why the “ick factor” had manifested itself, but I’m afraid that I can’t quite wrap my queer head around it.

Yes, you’re partially correct: The “ick factor” is a not new term, and it is not yours. But to say that the term has been co-opted and accepted as an “established notion” to the gays is a complete misrepresentation on your part, having nothing to do with the actions of so-called “same-sex marriage advocates and militants.”

In my piece, the “ick factor” became a sort of catch-all phrase under which I spoke with some community leaders and academics, including Dr. Martha Nussbaum, on their perspectives on the concept. For many of the people I spoke with, the “ick factor” was an idea they had never before heard and many well-established LGBT leaders declined to comment. It is not a commonly uttered phrase among gays and lesbians – just a quick perusal of Google search results will find references to shows like Friends and Sex and the City, diet aids and ice-dancing siblings, colon cancer home-screening and bad ’60s pop songs. No other articles from LGBT media, previous to your PR flap, mention the phrase.

That aside, I cannot understand how the fact that the phrase is not new renders your comment justifiable in the first place, particularly when all the words surrounding it spew injustice.

But this is more important than a discussion about etymology or ethics. Or completing the research you feigned doing yourself. This isn’t about attacking you or raising funds – although you, yourself, have attempted to capitalize on the matter by asking for campaign donations at your statement’s end. And this isn’t even really about the New Yorker statement itself – you yourself have said far worse things previously.

This is about the livelihood of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Americans – including those you banned from adopting children in Arkansas – and the damage you willfully inflict on our lives with practically every damning word you utter through your bigoted laughter.

This is about your deliberate arrogance to deny full equality for an entire class of mothers, fathers, sons and daughters. Though we might “ick” you out, Mr. Huckabee, we are here to stay. To consistently condemn us while at the same time calling yourself a Christian is, in my mind, deplorable,  indefensible and hypocritical for a self-described man of faith.

If you’re going to pretend to know our community and the phrases we use, at least do your homework first, Mike.

–Joe Erbentraut

SSION's BOY is currently being screened in LA.

That’s actually a complete lie. I went into my phone interview with Critcheloe, meant to preview his band’s New Year’s Eve appearance at Berlin Nightclub, feeling prepared for pretty much anything. I’d seen all the videos, read other reviews and caught up on the performer’s blog and Twitter – an increasingly interesting source for question ideas with public figure-types.

So, when I called Critcheloe at 11 a.m. just a few days after Christmas, I launched confidently into asking the performer about his stage show, working with Peaches, touring with Gossip and being a “lesbian at heart” – clearly we had a nice little bond going, at least as good of one you could expect from a half-hour-long interview.

Eventually, I’d asked Critcheloe what he made of the (then recent) controversy another black-eyeliner-wearer, one Adam Lambert, had encountered – a topic I’m currently touching on in a longer piece that should be out next week. While some of the conversation that followed made it to the final story, the bulk of it did not.

Here’s what went down somewhere between his passing me off to his “girlfriend,” whom I talked to for a few minutes, and the somewhat-fragmented stream of consciousness brought into action by my question. Somewhere along the line we went from American Idol to Critcheloe’s own American Dream.

Cody Critcheloe: It seems like whenever there are extravagant gay male pop stars – someone like Boy George – it’s shocking to people, and they say, “He’s such a fag.” And no one picked up on it! Even my dad loved Boy George growing up … But I think it’s different for Adam Lambert because he chose the route of American Idol as his path. You have a whole different audience looking at you and critiquing you. He set himself up for being abused. It’d be different if he started out in shitty nightclubs and worked his way up. I think people would say that’s part of his thing if that had happened. It’s sad.

An affirmative.

Me: How does your family feel about what you do?

Critcheloe: They’re not really aware, and I think they’re confused by it. I don’t go home and talk about it either. First of all, they’re not interested, second of all, why explain it? They know I make music and make art, but I’m not sure they know how it all comes together. Having people like [Lady] Gaga or Adam Lambert in the public eye does give them an idea of what I’m doing, even if it’s a really mundane, pathetic version of it.

Me: Do you have a day job that you balance with the band?

Critcheloe: I’ve been really lucky in some ways because I haven’t had to work a day job since May, so that’s been incredible. But at the same time, that also means I have to work really hard and am always constantly a bit nervous this could stop at any point … But I’m a really fucking shitty waiter. I’m shitty at everything but singing, it just comes to me. The goal is to work comfortable and do the things you want to do. That’s the biggest perk that comes with being famous, with more exposure comes the ability to do the things you love and be paid to do it.

Me: It’s refreshing that you’re more upfront about that than most musicians are.

Critcheloe: Well, I come from a middle-class family and I don’t give a shit that I’m totally 100 percent American. I want nice things and I want to work. I’m only happy when I’m working. I want to be creative and work on interesting projects. The only people who diss the American Dream are the people who have enough money to diss it. I don’t give a shit. I want a nice car and nice things.

Enjoy SSION’s video for Bullshit below.

Previous scraps: A trip to the zoo with Kevin Chamberlin | Dragonette and the conundrum of cool

If you like what you hear of these musicians, Google them, go to their show, buy their tunes. And tell them I sent you.

Mirah
Generosity (mp3)
I had to start this list with an artist who was really more of a re-discovery in 2009 than a newfound treasure. I must admit that when I first heard Mirah’s tunes several years back, I wasn’t overly moved by the folksy-woodsy queer jams. But (a)spera, Mirah’s newly-released album from this past year, is magnificent and has been greatly overlooked by many of the blogosphere’s lists-that-be. The album combines deeply personal lyrics with swelling string orchestrations and deserves to be held in the same – if not higher – company as some of the other, newer ladies-of-weird who shone this past year.

Local Natives
Wide Eyes (mp3)
These California boys are a very recent find, as I was tipped off by the Guardian’s profile last month. This track – off the yet-to-be-released Gorilla Manor – is the first track of theirs I heard. I was immediately struck by the wintry piece of harmonious heaven, and later impressed by their use of unusual, African-esque percussive rhythms to break up their beautiful vocal glissandos. Their sound is slightly reminiscent of Justin Vernon on uppers. On vacation in LA. In fast-forward. Or Fleet Foxes, but actually good.

Golden Silvers
True No. 9 Blues (True Romance) (mp3)
One of the biggest joys of no longer being unemployed – probably my biggest accomplishment of the past year – was the ability to buy music again, and my vinyl collection has since swelled. One of the first albums I picked up with my bits of discretionary income was True Romance from Golden Silvers, a band that belies easy classification. I’d already heard one track – the pleading “Please Venus” – via a blog, but the full record – which is a lovely hue of lavender – took my appreciation for the band to a new level. Their music is flamboyantly poptastic to be certain, but its psychodelic vibe felt surprisingly refreshing on first listen. Despite holding a certain retroness to it, their sound grows more addictive with each listen.

Bombay Bicycle Club
Always Like This (mp3)
Another Brit pop outfit that rocked my headphones this past year is Bombay Bicycle Club. This track, off their endearingly-titled “I Had the Blues But I Shook Them Off,” is particularly pleasing, and has become a staple of my frequent mixes made for friends. It plays well as a transition song between the opening, upbeat first-third of a mix and the more introspective, slower middle-third, indicative of the band’s successful combination of soul-searching lyrics (like “I’m not whole / I’m not whole / Oh, you waste it all”) with undeniably catchy instrumentation. Other tracks on their debut go into unexpected, more experimental directions, proving this is a band whose next move is never predictable. What is it about Brit boys and their mastery of the pop music machine – and my heart?

Ramona Falls
Clover (mp3)
Ramona Falls, the solo project of Menomena’s Portland-based Brent Knopf, at times feels like a psychiatrist’s exercise. But that’s OK. Intuit, the debut album looking inside the songwriter’s head, is not exactly an optimistic creation, but proved both ambitious and delicious to this listener’s ear. This track is particularly epic with its bleak lyrics -  “My heart wants just to know that it exists / My heart wants just to know” – and slow-building, then quietly-dissipating  guitar and percussion. Other songs bring in haunting piano and plenty of unusual structures. Even if he could be in need of a good pharmacist, Knopf is clearly a musical prodigy, and his debut solo effort is remarkable.

Lightning Dust
Dreamer (mp3)
Speaking of the structure of a mix CD – this is the portion of the list dedicated to those aforementioned introspective songs that usually compromise the middle section. And the Canadian band Lightning Dust could not fit better anywhere else on this list. I was first clued into the project of Black Mountain’s Amber Webber and Joshua Wells by Carrie Brownstein via NPR’s All Songs Considered, and the hype she lent their music was clearly well-deserved. Their album, Infinite Light, is one of my favorites of this past year. The songs are laden with nostalgia, desire and a quiet sense of optimism shining just under the surface of their sparse musical creations.

My Gold Mask
Violet Eyes (mp3)
Naturally, this list would not be complete without at least one local contribution, and My Gold Mask are one of the hottest bands to watch in the Windy City. I first came across this duo after having a few too many vodka-sodas at the Decibelle kickoff party at Berlin last October. Playing after French electro-singer-songwriter Emilie Simon, the couple blasted into their set with an energy – and surprising amount of sound – that could not be ignored. The release party for their A Thousand Voices EP last weekend at the Hideout was sold-out and equally impressive. Her presence is particularly transfixing, similar to an early Karen O.

Clues
Perfect Fit (mp3)
Given this Montreal band’s previous roots – including former members of the Unicorns and Arcade Fire – it is not surprising that their sound is a feast for the ears, at least if you dig somewhat dark vaudevillian, cabaret pop stylings. Their self-titled debut – out last year – is another that I was surprised did not make more best-of-’09 lists. The album combines bizarre, often grim lyrics with song structures that land all over the map but never, never bore. So get a clue – har – and give this band a listen.

Ellie Goulding (feat. Frankmusik)
Wish I Stayed (mp3)
If you haven’t yet jumped on the Ellie Goulding bandwagon, you are, frankly, running out of time before takeoff. Goulding has found herself near the top of most Brit critics’ ones-to-watch lists in recent weeks, and the accolades are well-deserved. Her voice has that incredible quality that hipster remix-creating DJs and pop audiences alike fall in love with. Her EP was fantastic and her other endeavors – including vocals for Starsmith’s beautiful remix of Passion Pit’s “Sleepyhead” – have only furthered the case for her impending stardom. Her debut album – Lights – is out in March. (And this track features another adorable Brit, Frankmusik, who narrowly missed this list. He’s like Cher’s bi-curious electro-baby.)

Chew Lips
Salt Air (mp3)
These exciting Kitsune darlings from South London are also remix-friendly and more than ready to boil over with just a bit more time to simmer. Their electronic creations combine somewhat sinister lyrics with sleek production. They represent a lot of styles that are catching on right now, without being too much of any particular musical trend to remain enticingly fresh. This is electro-pop at its finest – keep an eye out for their debut album – Unicorn – out this month.

Cold Cave
The Trees Grew Emotions and Died (mp3)
I realize this Philly-based project – led by the former hardcore head Wesley Eisold – makes eleven, but I couldn’t bring myself to narrow the list down any further. And technically, Cold Cave’s sound is so derivative-at-times (see: “Love Comes Close,” New Order) that it nearly fits into the category of “re-discovery.” But this stuff – based in synth beats, feedback and distortion – is so solid that I really couldn’t care more that the sound may not be the most original.

First and foremost, when I get in touch with a show’s PR team, they usually hook me up with one of the show’s lead names. And when interviewing actors of such prominence, a certain degree of prudishness can be expected. When I previewed Legally Blonde, I interviewed Elle Woods, played by Becky Gulsvig, a very wholesome Minnesotan-at-heart who giggled anxiously when I noted the show probably attracted a lot of gay fans — “Yes, it’s awesome,” she replied cautiously. When Spring Awakening came into town, I spoke with Melchior Gabor himself, Jake Epstein (of Degrassi fame), who spoke nervously of his few seconds of partial nudity on stage. Such PG-rated responses really aren’t the stuff exciting interviews are made from, but I don’t necessarily expect actors to speak too open about sexuality in the first place.

So, when I’d been assigned to preview The Addams Family‘s pre-Broadway romp at the Oriental Theatre, I decided to aim high and get a spicy interview subject, asking for 20 minutes to chat with the very-gay Nathan Lane, who stars as Gomez.

“He isn’t doing press right now” – my dismissive reply.

OK, how about Jackie Hoffman, an almost equally very-gay actress playing the role of the grandmother?

“She’s very busy promoting her one-woman show … But what about Kevin Chamberlin? He’s great.”

Now, another lesson: Usually if a publicist needs to say how great someone is, they likely are not. But, running out of options and still hoping for a shot at comp tickets to the show, I set up a time to speak with Chamberlin.

And then began the research, which revealed the 46-year-old actor’s Tony nomination and noteworthy appearances in gay cinematic classics including Trick, In & Out and the farcical’s 2007 Broadway run. But, perhaps even more interesting than those undeniably important achievements was the finding that Chamberlin is Broadway’s bear community poster boy. He is a co-founder of MetroBears NYC and appears regularly at bear events including International Bear Ren and Chicago’s Bear Pride. How could I resist bringing these key facts up?

And I did. Only three questions into our half hour-long interview, the conversation turned from the macabre singing-dancing family to the politics of being a bear. A good two-thirds of our conversation had absolutely nothing to do with theater. And while I couldn’t help but include some of the conversation that ensued, the bulk did not make it to the story’s final draft, featured on EDGE earlier this month.

Chamberlin: I’ve found it interesting to watch the bear community evolve – it’s like a social experiment watching the groups that have formed because of a reaction to another group. That’s why the bear community occurred, as a reaction to the muscle boy, hairless, self-waxing gay male stereotype. And it was a reaction to the AIDS crisis, people not wanting to look thin and quiffed. We wanted to look real and blend more [into society], to be embraced with the more masculine, real man look …

But it’s interesting, because now some schisms have been created. There’s the muscle bears, the chubs, the chasers. We’ve been splintering into more and more specific groups, whether it’s based on a fetish or outside activity like the gay softball or rugby teams forming … As more people come out of the closet, they find places to go and meet people who are like-minded. That wasn’t really the case when I was growing up and that’s what drew me in in the first place.

Me: Do you feel that the schisms are harming the community’s original intent?

Chamberlin: It’s an important community to me in how it’s very welcoming. And I’m hoping it will stay that way. As some gay groups have come up, they’ve become more exclusive, but it needs to stay accepting. And there’s new terms coming all the time. Redheads are orangutans, older guys can be silver-backed gorillas…

Me: And you have otters included in that, too.

Chamberlin: Oh, of course, otters! Who knows, the monkey movement might be on the way next.

Though I’m still not sure what a monkey is – a former-gymnast-turned-otter-chaser-or-both? Whatever the case may be, the moral of this story: Never turn down the opportunity to discuss bear identity politics. Even if it doesn’t get you free tickets to a Broadway production.

Now enjoy, this bear-related jam, from one of my favorite newly-discovered bands of this past year..

Download: The Antlers – Bear (mp3)

Previous Scraps: Dragonette and the conundrum of cool

The idea of exploring curiosities is fundamental to why I enjoy speaking with and learning from artists. Though my field is technically scientific in nature, expressions of artistry have always deeply inspired my journalistic process in how it re-energizes my sense of observation and broadens my perception of the realities surrounding me. This is a world of sounds, colors and shapes more than a world of numbers, formulas and statistics and these things should never be left out of the storytelling process.

One artist whose work has consistently inspired and informed my perspective on art, journalism and storytelling is street-performer-turned-musician Amanda Palmer, formerly of the Dresden Dolls. I know I’ve spoken of her a bit on this blog before, but her work epitomizes these things which I am trying (in a very meandering way) to get at. Through her music, writing (her blog is a great read), she enlivens the idea of all of us storytelling creators as a global community in an increasingly fractionalized world. She isn’t afraid to try things that haven’t been done before and is pioneering what I believe is an early version of a new economic model for creative-types to earn a living doing the thing they love to do. A beautiful concept, no?

Palmer’s most recent creation that grabbed my eye is a music video she made with Michael Pope for the Tegan and Sara single “Hell.”

Filmed over the course of one day in New York City, Palmer pays homage to the Canadian twins’ fantastic song with an impassioned piece of performance from the streets. Palmer had this to say regarding the video’s inspiration:

“….i got the idea brewing when i saw some footage of tegan intro-ing the song at town hall in NYC a few months ago and talking about how she would pass all these homeless people in her new neighborhood in vancouver and feel that awful feeling you feel of frustration and hopelessness. i worked from there. some of the best things that happened never made it onto film, i wish you could have seen what i saw that day. it felt really good to run through the city at the top of my lungs, with an actual excuse that was (relatively) sane. i always feel like doing that. but i rarely have a reason.”

It’s pretty rad to see Palmer’s version of T+S’s experience.

And in the interest of keeping the dialogue rolling, via another expression of this love, cover songs, is a T+S cover of The Bowie. Enjoy!

Download: Tegan & Sara ‘Rebel Rebel’ (David Bowie cover) (mp3)

As you may know, I do a lot of interviews with a lot of different people for the stories that I write. And quite often, due to space constraints, word limits or a piece’s thematic arch, terribly interesting bits of info are left out from the final product. And, also missing from that end product, are all the “hazards” of the trade. The strange, awkward, unexpected moments where a story source asks me to send pool-side, nude photos along with a link to the final story. (Yes, that really happened.)

“Table scraps..” will share those stories. Think of it like a DVD extra. Or surprise morning sex. Enjoy!

——-

In mid-October, I was fortunate enough, thanks to the fabulous people at High Rise PR, to interview Martina Sorbara and Dan Kurtz, the king and queen of electro-pop outfit Dragonette, for EDGE just before they were set to headline a wicked evening of debauchery at the now-closed Sonotheque.

Sorbara and Kurtz getting their fix.

First, it was to only be a simple 20-minute phone interview with Sorbara, just a fun little question-and-answer thing to preview the show and continue my dream of interviewing as many of the names responsible for the tunes constantly streaming through my iPod. I’ve loved Dragonette since I first heard a remix of their seminal jam “I Get Around” via a friend’s mix CD in early 2007, when the band was just beginning to take wing.

Now, they’ve released a second album, Fixin to Thrill, which is equally stellar. And, at least in my book, they are worthy of some major cred for their danceable, remix-ready pop gems. I was psyched for the interview, had done extensive research, listened to every track they’d ever released and thought my prepared questions would create a fool-proof golden interview. It would grace the RSS feeds of indie music blogs the world over and add ammo to my quest to one day write for Paste, Rolling Stone or [insert noteworthy music publication of the future here].

But alas, I knew from Sorbara’s sparse response to my first question that those things remained far away. Yes, she was sweet, kind and apologetic for her head cold… But she wasn’t giving me much content of note worth the quote during an afternoon break before her Calgary show that night.

The complete Dragonette crew.

Fortunately enough, I was able to chat a few days later with Kurtz, while he and the band sat in their room in Portland’s Jupiter Hotel (room 131 of this crazy tricked-out “boutique hotel” if you’re ever in town and want to soak up some of the pop brilliance). And this guy came ready to spout off, as we spoke for a half hour, twice as long as the 15 minutes I’d asked for.

Just after confiding that his wife had tossed the piece of “processed cheese” from her knitted hamburger (made of merino wool) in his face, Kurtz provided this answer to my question of what musicians he’d like to collaborate with. His answer was surprisingly frank, slightly bitter, but incredibly refreshing in a world of recycled agency-fed “talking points” and marketing plan-inspired drudgery.

Me: Who would you like to work with on in the future, remixes, collaborations or otherwise?

Kurtz: “I don’t know … I think I’d like us to work in another genre of music with somebody who can really teach us something new. I know that sounds really vague and whatever … But for example, I’d love to learn how to write a great country song. To work with Dolly Parton or Willy Nelson, that’d be great and entirely outside of our element, not that I even like country music.

Me: You were quick to add that caveat! Honestly, that’s surprising to me, you all don’t strike me as fans of the ‘twang, per se. Though the banjo on “Gone Too Far” off the new record is certainly moving in that direction.

Kurtz: Well, it’s Tina who brings that. She’s the fountain of country music in our scene. It would be more of an intellectual exercise than anything. As Dragonette, we’ve existed so far outside of … If I could tell you the number of times the achingly cool music group du jour have been offended by the question “Would you like to remix Dragonette?” It’s just always seemed like we had to fight really hard to get respect in this “town.” I think it’s a bit outside the realm of possibility to work with the “achingly hip” people, so we’ll maybe just go to some old-timers to write stuff, people who truly know how to make music.

And that’s a zing against you daily special bands out there. Next, I asked Kurtz, given the band’s recent exposure on shows like CSI and The Hills, what television shows or films he foresaw his tunes playing during. And again, he had some interesting words about the industry’s hip types.

Me: What television shows or sorts of films would you like to see Dragonette tunes featured in?

Kurtz: I suppose I’d go with the shows I like to watch. I’d like to see my own song pop up on a show like Weeds, Mad Men or Breaking Bad, or one of the big fuck-off British TV shows like the Jeremy Clarkson car show. That’s top-tier. If we moved off of TV and into movies, I’d pay money to have a song in a Wes Anderson movie. We do, perhaps, really like his movies, but then again we’re probably not hip enough for that. The last time we saw him, he was with some very hip people. He was sitting with Clive Owen at some club while we were in town. Oh well, you can always dream!

And here’s hoping they don’t stop dreaming anytime soon. And please, someone, tell them they’re still “cool” – Kurtz seems on the verge of a borderline inferiority complex. Meanwhile, enjoy the download below, a sexy remix of one of my favorite tracks off Fixin To Thrill.

Download: Dragonette ‘Easy’ (Buffetlibre remix) (mp3)

It is no secret that I love, love, love reading Craigslist’s treasure trove of awkwardness, the Missed Connections section. So, of course, as we all continue from a weekend filled with makeup, witches’ brew and masked make-out sessions, I couldn’t resist an opportunity to round-up some of my favorite Chicago MC’s to tell a little tale of Halloween lure (in addition to sharing some tunes).

Personally, Halloween has never been a holiday I associate with wild hook-ups, but maybe that’s because my costumes are usually not of the “Sexy (Fill-in-the-Blank)” variety. I’m usually in drag, covered in grotesque makeup with stubble poking through, and this year was no exception as I took on the role of Little Edie Beale from Grey Gardens. The below characters seem to have had some good luck knocking boots, even if they had a lot of explaining to do for their mother upon their return home. Here’s hoping the fates bring these lovers back together.

Missed my chance with Mr. Franzia – m4m (Belmont/Monroe)
Date: 2009-11-01, 11:33PM CST

“I had black paint smeared on my face. I admired the intricacy of your costume: Franzia boxed wine. We made some contact on the train before both getting off at Monroe. There we kissed at a street corner, where a passing driver yelled “FAGS!” at us (just in case you didn’t notice) … Sorry for not following, but, in all honesty, I was staying with my mom (who was visiting) in a hotel. That being said, I’d love to hear from you and maybe engage in some out-of-the-box conversation.”

ms wonderland left wondering? – w4m – 20 (in tinley)
Date: 2009-11-02, 2:40AM CST

“ok so i went 2 a halloween party with a gf and i was the sexy ms. wonderland girl. i was soooooooooooo wasted n u were so much fun and we ended up being naughty but i don’t remember most of it lol. u had on a dark costume not sure what it was though dah? well i have a bf so i guess it had 2 b a one time thing, just wanted 2 say if u ever read this i was the small blond who u helped have a really fun halloween!”

The outlaw Josey Wales – m4m (near loop)
Date: 2009-11-01, 6:47PM CST

“To the outlaw Josey Wales: it was so hot to watch you polishing your gun. A nice long gun, with a big thick barrel and a nice head to it. I can still taste that ammunition dripping into my mouth.”

Of course, since these are Missed Connections, after all, not all of these rendezvous were as successful. Lesson be learned: Be sure to carefully stow your beloved university-provided metro card when going home with handsome men in “dark costumes.”

Halloween Party then Your Apt – w4m (lincoln park area)
Date: 2009-11-02, 10:28AM CST

“Friday I was beligerent, I apologize. I dont remember practically anything when we got to your apt, let alone how we did till my friend filled me in. Uhh yah I lost my Upass at your place did you find it??? That would bloow if I have to find another one. Ps. “my buldge” seeing I was spider man is in your room too, white/pink soccer socks? Yeah, well I’m sorry for being a slob, im sure i was a huge one. But on the bright side I do think your adorable!”

Georgia at Halloween Church Party – m4w
Date: 2009-11-02, 5:15PM CST

“I was the Chaplin with whom you danced. I got swept up into an evening of events that now seem unreal. If you find this, please shoot me an email. I’d love to see you again and take you dancing.
Take Care

A Somewhat Silent Man”

oh, pinnochio – m4w (subterranean)
Date: 2009-11-01, 11:24AM CST

“that little boy look didn’t fool me, you were smoking hot. i never made it to the hideout, but i did spend a more than a few minutes thinking about what it would be like giving it to a puppet that wants to be a real boy, but is actually the hottest little girl in the room.”

But, I think the most important lesson from all of this is to watch out for each other. Halloween is a time for all of us to come together and bask in the ridiculousness of it all. And protect each other from violent religious leaders. Especially if you’re dressed as a pop diva.

Kid that got hit by the pope at Evil Olive – w4m – 21 (Evil Olive)
Date: 2009-11-01, 9:19AM CST

“Lady GaGa wants to make sure you’re ok.”

VAGUELY AUTUMNAL AUDIO MIX:

Download: Ramona Falls ‘I Say Fever’ (mp3) (+++)
Download: Florence and the Machine ‘Drumming’ (mp3) (+++)
Download: Crystal Waters ‘Gypsy Woman’ (Sharps Remix) (mp3)
Download: Squirrel Nut Zippers ‘Hell’ (mp3)
Download: Silversun Pickups ‘Booksmart Devil’ (mp3)
Download: Kate Bush ‘Get Out of My House’ (mp3)
Download: My Gold Mask ‘Bette Davis Eyes’ (mp3)
Download: Cold Cave ‘Youth and Lust’ (mp3) (+++)

(+++) denotes high levels of recommendation.

Therefore, in the spirit of lifelong learning [all the rage in these recession-riddled days, I hear], arrives the latest installment of this blog: “This one time, I…” Here, I will recount something I did during that past week/month/unspecified period of time I’d never done before. With pictures. First-hand accounts. Maybe even video or animated GIFs (you could be so lucky). Finally, for you Thievy McMusicPirates out there, there will be themed music mixes. It will be fun, I promise: TAKE THE CANDY. So, without further ado…

I grew a mustache.

Well, to be completely accurate, I trimmed my existing facial hair (which tends to be quite bountiful) into a mustache. It was something that always seemed like a good idea at the time, but alas, I lacked the bravery to walk about town sprouting a cookieduster. A flavor saver. A mouth brow. Until recently.

The product of a curious Friday night trim session resulted in a weekend-long case study into the discrimination faced by sporters of the pushbroom.

As I stared back in the mirror at what I’d done, I wondered if friends would treat me the same. If passers-by on the street would gawk. If my family would still love me. With a deep sigh, I turned away from the mirror and headed out the door to face the world I expected to shun me and my facial transgression.

As it turned out, besides a startled baby and an overly-friendly bear bartender, my mustache did not result in any unusual treatment. In fact, I could feel peoples’ eyes look at me with a fresh curiosity, a stirring interest. Historically, commanding officers of the military; like General Lew Wallace; strangely appealing pop stars of the ’70s and ’80s; including Freddie Mercury and Frank Zappa; and eccentric filmmakers enjoyed a certain air of reverie surrounding their ‘stache-wearing ways. And the Mario Bros. had a pretty phenomenal run. Perhaps, based on the results of this study, it could be argued that the well-documented cultural enchantment with the mustache lives on to the present day. Therefore (this is the thesis):

Operation StacheGrow = A success.

But, would I do it again, you ask? I can’t say I’d be in the quickest of hurries. In the end, my Diet Coke still tasted the same, the CTA was still dirty and the music in Boystown remained ear-bustingly loud. Despite the undeniable cult following my ‘stache enjoyed during its 2.5 days of existence, I still felt one pair of overly-large, “ironically-hip” glasses away from looking 100 percent creeptastic.

What I don't want to look like in fifteen years.

I’ll certainly keep it in mind if I ever become a pop star in need of a PR booster, a la John Oates’ “Ride the Mustache/J-Stache” campaign and its blog, Facebook page, Twitter feed and video series. Apparently Oates, er, J-Stache wants to “tame Leslie Feist’s shrew.” Which level of this statement do you find to be creepiest?

All told, I think this experiment has stirred a rediscovered admiration of the mustache to me. As the great lesbian philosopher Sheryl Concrowcious once said, “if it makes you happy, it can’t be so bad.” Despite carrying stigma in certain sub-communities, it has served as a symbol of manhood, virility and fuzziness for centuries – the first mustache – worn by a Scythian horseman – was documented in 300 BC. That’s before Jesus, therefore I believe it deserves our respect, honor and possibly its own religion. Or, at the very least, a photo montage. Below are a few of my favorite ‘staches through history, in addition to a little mini-mix for your ears (you know, the things on your face located directly to the left and right of your muzzy).

Discussion questions: Have you ever worn a mustache? Do you know someone who has? Do you plan to some day? Would you describe yourself as a Geraldo Rivera fan?

MUSTACHE MIX-A-LOT – A tribute to Nose Neighbors and Those Who Pull Them Off:

Download: Hall & Oates ‘Private Eyes’ (mp3)
Download: Natalie Portman’s Shaved Head ‘Beard Lust’ (mp3)
Download: SSION ‘Street Jizz’ (mp3)
Download: Islands ‘Creeper’ (mp3)
Download: Queen ‘Good Company’ (mp3)
Download: Patrick Wolf ‘The Hairy Song’ (mp3)

Or, download the whole mix.

Tagged: cheese curds, diet coke, dov charney, feist, frank zappa, freddie mercury, frida kahlo, fu manchu, general lew wallace, hall & oates, islands, john waters, lake geneva, magicians, mario brothers, mp3 download, mustache, natalie portman's shaved head, patrick wolf, queen, ssion, this one time i, wisconsin dells ]]> http://joe-erbentraut.com/2009/08/23/this-one-time-i-grew-a-mustache/feed/ 2 thegaywitch Photo 332 Photo 328 dov_charney FuManchu fridakahlo mario john-waters john-oates http://joe-erbentraut.com/2009/06/12/career-counseling/ http://joe-erbentraut.com/2009/06/12/career-counseling/#comments Fri, 12 Jun 2009 15:10:52 +0000 thegaywitch http://thegaywitch.wordpress.com/?p=349 Continue reading →]]> [Below is another tiny excerpt from my novel project - Wonderland. This post serves as a tribute to the modern, post-recession job hunt. For those job seekers out there, find a handy, middle school-esque career quiz at the end of the post. It's simple: Download each of the songs loosely based on an occupation. If you like the song, that means that you should pursue that career. Yes, it's that easy! Enjoy, and hang in there, job hunters.]

Pen against face = anxious job hunter? Maybe. They look like Vampire Weekend.

I’m a perfectionist.

What do you consider to be your biggest weakness?

Really, honestly. What is it?

And I’m not talking about the stock answer that you provide in every job interview – you know, one of the following required responses, all of which can actually be spun into positive things: “Sometimes, I don’t take enough time for myself, because I work too hard… Sometimes, I care too much… Sometimes, I’m too much of a team player.”

My biggest weakness at the moment, as it seemed as I was getting dressed before hopping on the train en route to my interview downtown, was being able to find a matching shirt and pants that were (a) clean, (b) not wrinkled and (c) coordinated with the one suit jacket I owned. Deciding that the slightly crinkled pale blue shirt would do, I headed out to the train station in a dash, convinced that I would be late.

Interview number one, as it turned out, was for a canvassing director position with an environmental non-profit organization, Green Illinois. The position did not pay well and demanded long, exhausting hours and I doubted that I would accept an offer even if it were granted to me. That said, I figured that it was worth the practice, and I was certainly not in a position to be turning down interviews from anywhere, anyone.

But then again, a job is a job…

Ding. Daydream over. I was now in an ornately-decorated elevator and had arrived at the floor of the office where I was to be meeting with Harrison Davis, an executive with a sister organization of Green Illinois’.

As I stepped out of the elevator, I glanced at my phone – 2:54 p.m. Six minutes to spare! Walking into the office, a group of three casually-dressed possible environmentalists turned simultaneously toward me with looks of disdain at being interrupted.

“Hi,” I said, with my voice cracking. “I’m here for the – the interview with – um, Harrison. About the canvass director position that you, or, the Fund has an op–”

“Interviewers go over there,” said a brunette wearing trendy Dolce & Gabbana frames a tight-fitting gray cashmere sweater, tweed skirt and hooker boots. She did not seem to be impressed by my inability to spit out a complete sentence explaining my presence in the office.

I walked past the cubicles and piles of boxes of sheets of paper and approached Harrison Davis, a somewhat gawky, awkward-looking man with short mousey brown hair, wearing a gray pinstriped suit and a purple striped tie. His initial expression toward me was only slightly less annoyed than the welcoming committee head that I’d encountered upon entering the office. I sat down on a metal folding chair after handing over a clean copy of my resume.

He looked it over pseudo-pensively for several seconds before launching his first question.

“So, it looks like you don’t have any direct campaign experience here. What makes you think you can just walk in here and do this job? Do you understand that this is difficult work?”

“Well, yes, I understand that there are a lot of responsibilities involved in the position, and that it is probably quite challenging…” I began as Harrison sliced a hole through my forehead with his menacing stare. “When I was in my undergrad in Madison, I learned several lessons right away, while trying to balance school, work, internships and volunteer work. First of all, it was that priotizing was crucial. Second, that sometimes you need to ask for help and build coalitions. For example, in one of my jobs…”

“No, I mean, you can’t just waltz in here and think that just anyone can do this,” he continued, staring at the wall while avoiding my eye contact until he suddenly shifted his gaze back in my direction. “Really, what skills do you have?”

“I have good organizational skills, can run meetings, have recruitment experience…” I slowly realized that I was growing increasingly sweaty – I felt my chair sink in the floor as I faced cross-examination from the defense stand. “And on my resume you’ll notice the computer programs I’m familiar with are quite numerous. And –”

“OK, OK – Got it, you’re not a moron. Super.”

“Um, yeah, I guess,” I replied, as face deepened to a medium shade of pink. “I mean, what I’m getting at is that I have employed many leadership skills in my previous positions, actually including quite a bit of volunteer and intern coordination, in addition to fundraising and team-building. I–”

“Okay, well… I have a meeting coming up, so let’s just get this over with. Would you relocate?”

“Honestly, probably not,” burst the words from my mouth before I had even given them a thought. I began to sweat. My face: From pink to a light red – what shade would they call that? Suddenly, the job I was barely sure I even wanted in the first place seemed bigger than the room. Bigger than the entire high-rise office tower. Bigger than the world. “I mean, I just moved here from Madison and have a one-year lease I was planning to live out. I live in Andersonville, it’s a really nice neighborhood and–”

“Right, right. We’ll see what we can do. How about you fill out this informational sheet. Be sure to list the places you would be willing to relocate to right here. I’m sure we’ll be calling you later this week, I think you’d be perfect for this job.”

“Oh, um, thank you.” Confused.

“Yeah. You can show yourself out. Nice… meeting you.”

He tentatively extended his hand while standing up, before leaving the room.

The next day I was offered the job for which I was (apparently) completely unqualified for.

Maybe it was pity, or maybe it was a fluke, but whatever the case may have been, I turned down the offer for a position entailing 70+ hour work weeks and a fair share of street canvassing, which is only a few steps above panhandling.

CAREER QUIZ MIX — The song you like most represents your ideal future career! (Sorry, no one sings about accountants..)

Download: St. Vincent ‘Actor Out of Work’ (mp3)
Download: Garotas Suecas ‘Ghostwriter’ (mp3)
Download: The Barmitzvah Brothers ‘Thrift Store Owner’ (mp3)
Download: Final Fantasy ‘The Butcher’ (mp3)
Download: M. Ward ‘Underaker’ (mp3)
Download: Tori Amos ‘Waitress’ (Live in Chicago, 11/6/07) (mp3)

"Encoded title doesn't give away as much as it should."

The mixtape, described by author Geoffrey O’Brien as “the most widely practiced American art form” is far from a modern invention, as it turns out. That said, the ease of digital sharing has certainly made it a whole lot easier to mass distribute faux-personalized compilations of tunes. The original mixtapes weren’t actually homemade as they are today, but were instead bootleg 8 track tapes often sold at flea markets or truck stops. In the ’80s, cassettes became popular as their quality increased and voila! Soon, teenage lovers and tech-savvy 20- and 30-somethings were communicating their feelings and thoughts by using other peoples’ feelings and thoughts. And yes, it is just as tricky as it sounds to have that work out.

Personally, I’ve been creating mixes for friends, lovers and whoever will listen for well over a decade now. They’ve ranged from the casual (“I just threw a bunch of songs on a disc to listen to in the car on the way to -road trip destination here-“) to the thinly-veiled flirtatious (“These 19 songs represent the 19 that come as close as physically possible to saying ‘I want in your pants’ without actually saying it”) to the esoteric (“This CD represents the progression of a modern relationship between a man and a woman; the songs are in conversation with each other – alternating between partners – and coalesce in heartbreak and eventual acceptance”).

They say hello, they say I miss you, they say I want you. Or, it could say “I searched for every possible name of a color on my iTunes playlist and these are the best that I got!” (No, it was not all Joni Mitchell covers.) No matter what the message, it’s the process of creation and sharing that becomes ultimately enjoyable to me, as the maker. It’s a joy that I hope is matched by the listener’s experience.

So, I ask you, why do you create mixes? Do you recall the best mix you’ve ever received? What about the strangest? What is the favorite mix you’ve created?

Coming soon to a meaningful mix CD being converted to your laptop's library?

And finally, the question of the hour, what’s the secret to a “perfectly matched” mix? Because, despite all the years of practice.. I still truly have no idea. Is it all about a seamless build to a lavish finish? Is it about juxtaposing the unusual with the familiar? What about a mid-mix instrumental break? Can ABBA (Flower power/’Fernando’ ABBA not wedding anthem/’Dancing Queen’ ABBA) still be enjoyed ironically, or are Swedish disco acts passe?

UNPRETENTIOUS (BUT STILL “ARTFULLY THOUGHT-PROVOKING”), POPPY (BUT NOT TOO POPPY) JUNE JAMZ

Download: Jarvis Cocker ‘Fuckingsong’ (mp3)
Download: Patrick Wolf ‘Hard Times’ (Jack Beats Remix) (mp3)
Download: School of Seven Bells ‘Half Asleep’ (mp3)
Download: Marina & the Diamond ‘Obsessions’ (mp3)
Download: Dragonette ‘Marvellous’ (mp3)
Download: The Spinto Band ‘Summer Grof’ (mp3)
Download: Shugo Tokumaru ‘Rum Hee’ (mp3)
Download: Passion Pit ‘The Reeling’ (Miike Snow Remix) (mp3)

My favorite moment in the past week: This quote from Rita Mae Brown (on gay marriage): “…I do not see, if we actually believe the Constitution, how [marriage] can be denied. And I add, the only way I will tie the noose is around somebody’s neck. I don’t mate in captivity.” Check out the interview with Rita in its entirety, and the other stories, by clicking on the images below.

How do you deal with a rough day/week/month?

Sure, I mean there’s the obvious: A bottle (or other container) of your substance of choice. Distraction. Intoxication. Trying to forget.

But what if that doesn’t work?

If you’re at all like me, you launch into a cleaning/reorganizing frenzy. Out come the creme-coloured filing folders, cue the mock-up drafts of new bedroom furniture arrangements and make some coffee – this is going to be a big project.

As you dig through the piles of papers and envelopes to cards you’d sooner forget receiving, nostalgia is hard to avoid: A grimace, a slight smile, a faint giggle. That trademark stomach-sinking feeling. These scraps, stubs and receipts are all that’s left of days past – the places we’ve gone, the plays and movies that we’ve seen, the faces and bodies we used to swim alongside in this giant pool. <Best served with copious amounts of Fiona Apple playlists>.

“I miss you.”

I. Miss. You. How was it possible that such a seemingly simple, three-word sentence carry such complication, rendering doubt over its true meaning? Pushing aside the pair of pronouns, the remaining four-letter verb can be defined eight different ways:

1. to fail to hit or strike: to miss a target.
2. to fail to encounter, meet, catch, etc.: to miss a train.
3. to fail to take advantage of: to miss a chance.
4. to fail to be present at or for: to miss a day of school.
5. to notice the absence or loss of: When did you first miss your wallet?
6. to regret the absence or loss of: I miss you all dreadfully.
7. to escape or avoid: He just missed being caught.
8. to fail to perceive or understand: to miss the point of a remark.

Suddenly, the sentence — scrawled dozens of times on Facebook walls to long-lost high school “friends” and college acquaintances, usually followed by “let’s totally get coffee and catch up soon! yeah!” – doesn’t seem so simple or empty anymore. It never was.

SONGS FOR A FOUR-LETTER WORD:

Download: Los Campesinos! ‘It’s Never That Easy Though, Is It? (Song for the Other Hurt)’ (mp3)
Download: PJ Harvey ‘Silence’ (mp3)
Download: Metric ‘Help I’m Alive’ (mp3)
Download: Cold War Kids ‘Hang Me Up to Dry’ (mp3)
Download: Passion Pit ‘The Reeling’ (mp3)
Download: Nite Jewel ‘Lover’ (mp3)

Eee, gay marriage.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you probably know that Iowa just legalized it, Friday, becoming the third state to do so. And there’s a tiny chance that Vermont might soon follow (though the state’s House vote fell just four votes short of the majority approval needed to squelch the governor’s intended “veto” – but we’ll just have to wait and see on that one..). As expected, the social conservatives are outraged – perhaps with even more fervor than usual given that Iowa is far from a hotbed of liberal thought.

Glum, anti-gay marriage Iowans gather in January 2008, when the case was first brought to court.

You can almost write your own thought bubbles for these non-fans of not-straight-people marriage: Suddenly, it seems, perhaps it’s not so trendy to be outwardly anti-gay. It feels, at the risk of sounding naively optimistic, that positive momentum might finally be with As more and more state governments begin to take seriously their duty of protecting the rights of minorities (i.e. not putting issues related to minority rights up to majority vote), their greatest fears might just come true: Among them, the defeat of the federal Defense of Marriage Act (which President Obama has promised to repeal) and further spreading of state-approved queer unions. A right-wing nightmare, no?

But, as much as I want to throw my hands up in the air and dance wildly to RuPaul remixes, I still can’t help but feel that the Iowan decision – in the grand scheme of things, even if it does encourage similar action in other states – smells of too little, too late. For this is exactly the case for some people. Take, for example, Shirley Tan, a woman who has been in a committed lesbian relationship, mothering twin 12-year-old sons, for the past 23 years, who is on the verge of deportation from California’s Bay Area to the Philippines. If she and partner Jay Mercado were allowed to marry, it would be a non-issue. Instead, Tan (and her family) must argue her right to remain stateside, receiving a two-week emergency stay last week with the help of politicos. Learn more about the story below (and from this San Jose Mercury News article):

In light of the continued inequity in the other 47 U.S. states, activists are rightfully continuing to organize, rally and raise a general stink… But I have to question some of the tactics: Here in Chicago, the homosexual drinking establishment Cocktail has come under some fire for banning bachelorette parties from taking place on its premises. Hung outside of Cocktail is a sign that explains the ban, in addition to offering a statement:

Until same-sex marriage is legal everywhere and same-sex couples are allowed the rights as every heterosexual couple worldwide, we simply do not think it’s fair or just for a female bride-to-be to celebrate her upcoming nuptials here at Cocktail. We are entitled to an opinion, this is ours.

And other bars have followed suit. I have to wonder: Is alienating a (likely) already queer-friendly audience beneficial to the cause? Allies are crucial to any civil rights battle, and though I understand Cocktail’s point-of-view (and the fact that they are acting completely within their right as independent business owners).. I’m simply not sure how this sits with me.

No protest here: Color me RSVP'ed +1.

On a more personal level, I recently received a wedding invitation to the ceremony of one of my dearest friends, coming up this summer. And I couldn’t help but smile when I thought ahead to the day, and the incredible impact that it will have for my friend. Flaunting a privilege? Rubbing it in? Hardly. I could not be more excited for Sarah and the life that she is building with her fiance. Ya know, happiness and eternal love. That’s all that all of us really want anyway, right?

A COUPLE WEDDING-RELATED MUSICS:

Download: Yael Naem ‘Bachelorette (Bjork Cover)’ (mp3)

Download: Born Ruffians ‘Wedding Bells and Midnight Strollers’ (mp3)

Anyhoo, I’ve decided that I was ready to begin sharing my progress with some fresh sets of eyes. Shared below is the current shape of the piece’s introduction and first “chapter.” I would love any and all feedback that you may have. ^_^

———-

drawn-out, instrumental intro:“what is this noise?”

I sat at the window of his newly-rented flat — empty, with the notable exceptions of two twin tabbies — and stared at the wall. My mind should have been focused on securing a position on something resembling a payroll as the end of my first complete month of Chicago residence quickly approached. But I couldn’t help but drift from productive endeavors, choosing instead to count the freckles on the living room ceiling. The day to its current late-afternoon point had consisted of:

9:34 am: A light breakfast of Corn Chex
9:47 am: A morning hello from Seth, my boyfriend of two months: “Are u happy w how things r working out?”
10:27 am: Segue to a light, 21-minute long phone conversation with Seth, now re-identified with a brand new sub-title on his name tag: most recent ex-boyfriend
11:11 am: The first of a series of text messages from a former best friend and roommate laden in accusations of poor character following an as-of-yet unresolved, move out-related squabble

An early afternoon lunch of a delectable hummus wrap over coffee with Julie, my new roommate and already long-time friend, helped slightly to lift my spirits, but shortly thereafter, it was back to my current position, lounging in a surprisingly supportive beanbag chair listening to the end credits of The Devil Wears Prada, the first in what would likely be a lengthy mindless romance-comedy movie marathon at 1742 East Magnolia Street, Apartment 1, party of one.

Looking outside the sparkling front windows between glances at Rudy’s peaceful nap atop the scratching post, I’d just noticed that a sunny sky had emerged to replace the mid-August, mid-day rain shower. The rays of light illuminated countless rows of flowers on the tree-, brick house-, happy family-lined street that I now called home, and the undeniably pleasant view did nothing but deepen an already down disposition.

‘What is,’ I wondered, ‘these peoples’ secret? How did they do it?’ By ‘it,’ of course, I meant a myriad of things, all of which had felt just at the tips of my recent college graduate fingers just weekes before: The dream job, the attentive and attractive lover, the perfect apartment. The perfect life. Could it really be that difficult? Maybe all that was needed was a how-to guide book, if only I could afford that…

Money. A sensitive subject. A first night out at the bars in Boystown two nights before had eaten away at my last bit of cash and it seemed doubtful whether the checking account held enough to cover a soon-to-be-due credit card bill, let alone money to eat, drink or — more or less — leave the apartment and do anything other than to wander the unfamiliar streets aimlessly.

Let me go ahead and do your inner dialogue for you:

So, who needs another whiny story of a bitchy queen who just got dumped and lacks employment?

That’s not what this story is about and that’s not who I am. This story is about my journey. A journey to etch a place for myself in this world. To risk losing it all for the sake of maybe making the world a better place. Or at the very least, finding my own piece of happiness amongst the shards of disappointment, scraps of clarity and slivers of insanity scattered along the way.
– August 13, 2008, 4:13 pm

tape 1, track 1: “21 text messages”
sounds like: fiona apple meets elliott smith, with a hint more desperation

The next morning, I awoke to the realization that my status had shifted from “in a relationship” to “single” just twenty four hours earlier, as I curled up in the corner of my queen-sized bed draped in newly purchased Ikea finds. Although I had been sleeping alone for the past two weeks, the bed seemed especially too-large at the given moment, given the isolating events of the day before — adding boyfriendless to the pile of jobless and sexless.

A firm believer in a proactive approach in life, I first assessed my present situation. In terms of jobs, I’d already applied for dozens without many leads — and would likely be spending the entire day sitting at the side of my phone, waiting for a call back from the tapas restaurant at which I’d interviewed for a serving position days before. A freelance writing opportunity had also recently popped up, which was all well and good, but would not make much of a dent in monthly rent payments, unless I managed to write at a vastly increased, perhaps humanly impossible rate.

The man hunt did not appear to be any more promising, at least not immediately. And that was probably for the best. Just last night, Julie, myself and Beck, our third roommate, a beautiful Uma Thurman look-alike whom I had known since my freshman year of undergrad, had ventured out into the neighborhood to see what surprises the bar scene held in store for us. Although both stops along the mini-Andersonville pub crawl were fun enough, as I looked around, I noticed that each group — ours included — was completely inwardly focused. No one was approaching strangers with small-talk; no hope of meeting the elusive “anyone new,” but instead, these places had the definite vibe of a friendly neighborhood watering hole — at least on a Wednesday night, that is. Unless the atmosphere was considerably different during the weekend, these would not likely be sources of date-worthy individuals.

So, it appears the search would have to go online. A rough mental calculation earlier in the week — with a little help from the myriad of web journals and social networks that I’d maintained during the five years since coming out as queer to myself, friends and family — revealed that I had met nearly 40 men — strangers — through such avenues. Of the 40, five had become boyfriends (of the seven total relationships I had been in to that point) — a figure which roughly calculates to the lucky 13 percent. Most — roughly 80 percent — had resulted in at least a second date, however, at this point, these odds were good enough for me. I had not had sex for exactly three weeks and that needed to end ASAP.

Enter Ferdo. A 5-foot-4-inch mohawked dynamo with sun-caressed skin that I’d encountered through an online dating site. Ferdo, too, was new to the city, coming fresh off of a year spent in China teaching English to children, not exactly putting his degree in film to use, but proving to be a genuine do-gooder nevertheless. He had a air of quirk about him, and reminded me to some degree of a slightly less loopy Sufjan Stevens, or even Chris Garneau, sans lampshade collection. And, he even came complete with that air of a tortured artist’s soul. Maybe a little damaged, but in a sexy way. File under: “My type,” whatever that means.

Although Ferdo and I had not made set plans, a flirty phone conversation days before had confirmed that he would call on this day to set something up, and I could not have been a stronger mix of excited, nervous and even slightly intimidated. I had been so busy completing my final year of school and working dead-end jobs waiting tables and answering phones to [attempt to] build up an income cushion for my move that I hadn’t spent much time on dating before I drunkenly fell into my newest ex-boyfriend’s arms at Milwaukee Pride on a rainy June afternoon.

I wasn’t sure if I remembered how to date — if that was what this even was — and suspicions of the previous beau’s wandering eye had left me falling slowly into a self-conscious and decidedly less confident position along the totem pole of our it’s-a-small-world-after-all queer community. I wondered, as I sipped black coffee in a newly discovered Swedish cafe and typed away these very mutterings, if he would call at all. Even if he would, would I really want to bring my total of online meet-ups to 41, likely bringing the relationship quotient to an even-more-paltry 12 percent? As Thomas, my blissfully-reflective-though-painfully-arrogant friend from Madison, would have put it: My stock value was going down — falling fast — the great gay stock market crash of oh-eight.

Thomas is a an epic novel in and of himself, which I could hardly attempt to do justice in the midst of this narrative. For that reason, I will deem his stock market theory as questionable at best, pending further research. Pre-breakup facilitating text message the morning before, I had awoken to not one, two or three messages from my friend; but instead, twenty-one. They went a little something like:

1:09 am: I’m at club five and i hate everyone but i miss you hardcore.
1:14 am: I HATE GAY MEN. UGH UGH UGH UGH UGH…sad, so so so so sad.
1:15 am: please come to madison, i miss you hardcore. I hate so many gay lifestyles here. Our culture is so broken.
1:17 am: BITCHES ARE FEEDING ME DRINKS. I CAN’T TAKE ANYMORE. PEOPLE ARE HUMPING ME, and I can’t handle it. Ugh. Gross gross gross, I wanna dance w friends.
1:18 am: Ryan come home please
1:18 am: Please?
1:19 am: I can’t exist without real people
1:20 am: people are humping me. Thomas is not a happy panda. Thomas is a sad, sad, sad missing his friends panda.
1:25 am: There is NASTY NASTY NASTY gay porn on the tv’s everywhere I look. LIke, honestly, WHO has sex like THAT. Sorry I don’t [fuck] bitches LIKE THAT.
1:31 am: There aren’t real gay men. REAL GAY MEN DON’T NEED THIS… Garbage. To live. I’m sorry i’m text bombing you.
1:33 am: THE VIDEO they’re playing is FEATURING a bleeding asshole [Didn't really need that visual...]. Wow. That’s monumental!…not.
1:34 am: there two bews[?] asked to fuck me.
2:02 am: MADONNA IS MY BITCH!!!!!
2:08 am: Thomas = Worst sex life ever.
2:16 am: Let’s blast Madonna… Right………….. NOW!! RAY OF LIGHT! VOICES! HUNG UP! SORRY% DIE ANOTHER DAY!…i sense a marathon!
2:33 am: PERKINS = BAD JOB = SO GLAD I DON’T WORK HERE. HA! NASTY!!!!…..Gays gone wild! … Not in a good way.
2:35 am: Gays wild anywhere is GROSS. Unless they’re as hot…as us … I should stop drunk texting! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha sorry.
2:39 am: I’m allergic to Perkins.
2:40 am: I THINK I’M ALLERGIC TO GAY MEN……no, seriously.
2:46 am: Honestly, though, I don’t think I’ll ever find a gay man who is… With me. Spiritually, emotionally, etc.
3:40 am: Look at the stars, look how they shine for you and everything you do.

As I reflected on the series of messages, performing them for my roommates as a dramatic beat poetry-inspired monologue and contemplating whether it was appropriate to quote them in this log, I wondered if, buried among the alcohol-induced it’s-so-difficult-to-be-as-attractive-and-meaningful-as-I-am-bleeding-asshole gobbledigook, perhaps Thomas had a point or two. ‘Our culture is so broken…,’ he had typed between sips of vodka-cranberries and Jaegerbombs. ‘There are no real gay men.’ What does the phrase “gay culture” even mean? Could that possibly be agreed upon by any group of reasonably-minded individuals or was it just another undefined, even romanticized concept lost in translation between sub-communities? And don’t even get me started on what a “real gay man” would do, say and think.

Somewhere along the way to the dawn of a new media world where near-instant sex was available any time, any where, and sales of botox, bronzer and brow-lifts burst to the brim, perhaps we had lost that sense of community that we were always said to have. Maybe we’d never even had it, at all; always lost in a mess of caricature from an overpowered, tyrannical artist – the beast fueled by capitalism, conservatism and consumerism. Maybe the term “LGBT community” had been designed by a by-now-very-rich advertising executive who had decades before discovered a group of misfits that could be loosely grouped together in order to desire and buy products and services.

Or maybe it was just another meaningless, drunken mess of a night at the club for Kyle and I was reading too much into it.

Ring.

It was Ferdo. Friday. Drinks in Boystown. A distraction from the increasing feelings of disappointment, and perhaps even a shot at something meaningful. Or at the very least, maybe a make-out session. Score.