Weddings: How very, very queer

Wow, marriage.

Eee, gay marriage.

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you probably know that Iowa just legalized it, Friday, becoming the third state to do so. And there’s a tiny chance that Vermont might soon follow (though the state’s House vote fell just four votes short of the majority approval needed to squelch the governor’s intended “veto” – but we’ll just have to wait and see on that one..). As expected, the social conservatives are outraged – perhaps with even more fervor than usual given that Iowa is far from a hotbed of liberal thought.

Glum, anti-gay marriage Iowans gather in January 2008, when the case was first brought to court.
Glum, anti-gay marriage Iowans gather in January 2008, when the case was first brought to court.

You can almost write your own thought bubbles for these non-fans of not-straight-people marriage: Suddenly, it seems, perhaps it’s not so trendy to be outwardly anti-gay. It feels, at the risk of sounding naively optimistic, that positive momentum might finally be with As more and more state governments begin to take seriously their duty of protecting the rights of minorities (i.e. not putting issues related to minority rights up to majority vote), their greatest fears might just come true: Among them, the defeat of the federal Defense of Marriage Act (which President Obama has promised to repeal) and further spreading of state-approved queer unions. A right-wing nightmare, no?

But, as much as I want to throw my hands up in the air and dance wildly to RuPaul remixes, I still can’t help but feel that the Iowan decision – in the grand scheme of things, even if it does encourage similar action in other states – smells of too little, too late. For this is exactly the case for some people. Take, for example, Shirley Tan, a woman who has been in a committed lesbian relationship, mothering twin 12-year-old sons, for the past 23 years, who is on the verge of deportation from California’s Bay Area to the Philippines. If she and partner Jay Mercado were allowed to marry, it would be a non-issue. Instead, Tan (and her family) must argue her right to remain stateside, receiving a two-week emergency stay last week with the help of politicos. Learn more about the story below (and from this San Jose Mercury News article):

In light of the continued inequity in the other 47 U.S. states, activists are rightfully continuing to organize, rally and raise a general stink… But I have to question some of the tactics: Here in Chicago, the homosexual drinking establishment Cocktail has come under some fire for banning bachelorette parties from taking place on its premises. Hung outside of Cocktail is a sign that explains the ban, in addition to offering a statement:

Until same-sex marriage is legal everywhere and same-sex couples are allowed the rights as every heterosexual couple worldwide, we simply do not think it’s fair or just for a female bride-to-be to celebrate her upcoming nuptials here at Cocktail. We are entitled to an opinion, this is ours.

And other bars have followed suit. I have to wonder: Is alienating a (likely) already queer-friendly audience beneficial to the cause? Allies are crucial to any civil rights battle, and though I understand Cocktail’s point-of-view (and the fact that they are acting completely within their right as independent business owners).. I’m simply not sure how this sits with me.

No protest here: RSVP +1.
No protest here: Color me RSVP'ed +1.

On a more personal level, I recently received a wedding invitation to the ceremony of one of my dearest friends, coming up this summer. And I couldn’t help but smile when I thought ahead to the day, and the incredible impact that it will have for my friend. Flaunting a privilege? Rubbing it in? Hardly. I could not be more excited for Sarah and the life that she is building with her fiance. Ya know, happiness and eternal love. That’s all that all of us really want anyway, right?


Download: Yael Naem ‘Bachelorette (Bjork Cover)’ (mp3)

Download: Born Ruffians ‘Wedding Bells and Midnight Strollers’ (mp3)

Have friends getting gay-married anytime soon?

It’s been a busy few months for this ghey, but sanity has finally returned and Reality TV Makes Me Cry is now coming to you live from a new location — Chicago. I may not have cable yet, nor is my Internet connection the most reliable, but I intend to update this blog as frequently as I am able to with remarks on the various crazinesses of our world.

Yahtzee, game on.

Gay-friendly cards are now available from all Hallmark locations.
Hallmark goes gay with new cards.

Ever read a news story while instantly visualizing the next three headlines on that topic in the coming weeks? This was precisely my experience with this announcement from Hallmark that they would begin selling cards appropriate for gay-marrieds becoming civilly unionized, or whatever they call it these days, just in time for Portellen’s joyous union. These new cards arrive on the heels of a series of “coming out” cards unveiled last year by the retailer.

Cue the protesters: A number of Hallmark stores in the state of Idaho have announced that they will not carry the new offerings. The esteemed American Family Association has also added Hallmark to their shit list by encouraging a protest, just as they had earlier this year with the homo-friendly, gay pride mongers McDonald’s. Their rationale?

“… promoting same-sex marriage for profit is not the very best for families or our nation. Hallmark is a private company obviously driven by greed,” reads the official AFA petition. “Let them know you do not appreciate Hallmark promoting a lifestyle which is illegal in 48 states.”

Ho hum. You would think that the right-wing conservatives would find it enough to simply not buy the ghey cards and let the Bush-endorsed capitalist marketplace work itself out by eliminating the unholy pieces of parchment stuffed in equally evil envelopes. This is almost as amusing as the post-9/11 Dixie Chicks protest.

Anna Pastuszwska fall down, go boom, at her July 19 straight-wedding.
Anna Pastuszwska fall down, go boom, at her July 19 straight-wedding.

Speaking of illegal lifestyles and weddings, check out this story about a Michigan couple that was recently straight-married and wound up being tasered and spending the night in separate prison cells. Is this proof that the homosexual agenda has finally gained steam? Or did a bunch of bitches just get schwasted? Judge for yourself

Download: Dosh ‘I Think I’m Getting Married’

Download: Wolf Parade ‘Call It a Ritual’

Download: Telepathique ‘Love and Lust’